this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
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