In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
