This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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