Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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