I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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