The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
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