I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
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as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
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I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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