Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Randomize
