I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize