I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"