Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Randomize
