the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
