you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
