My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
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OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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