I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
my mouth tastes like poor choices
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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