i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
