When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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