I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
