you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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