Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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