sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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