Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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