Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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