I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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