I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
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