I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
I look better un-naked...
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Randomize