would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Randomize
