So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.