Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Randomize
