just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
