He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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