I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Randomize