remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
