I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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