And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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