fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
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