he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize