dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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