I faked an abortion last night.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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