Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
We were destined to go to rehab together
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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