before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize