Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
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