In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
either way he was missing a nipple.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
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