i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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