Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
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