Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Randomize
