You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I woke up under a house in Key West
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
