I could have mohawked her pubes.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
