I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
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