spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Randomize
