Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
