accomplished twins. life is a go
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
handjob tips. give me some.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Randomize
